Love, a basic human need.



The true value of life is found in the simple things in life,

love, peace & happiness.


Regardless of our culture, our level of education or economic status, at the depth of all of us are the same desires- to love, to be loved, and to be happy.

Of course we could add other desires to this list, like money and wealth, but when you drill into these things, the reason for wanting them is so that we can appear more desirable, and will hopefully be loved and accepted.

Humans need to feel a sense of belonging and acceptance, they need to love and be loved (sexually and non-sexually) by others.

There is one only happiness in life: to love and be loved, in the absence of love; people become loneliness, anxiety and depression.


Why do we search for love? 

All of us have an intense desire to be loved and nurtured. The need to be loved, could be considered one of our most basic and fundamental needs.

Given the importance of the need to be loved, it isn’t surprising that most of us believe that a significant determinant of our happiness is whether we feel loved and cared for.

In our pursuit of the need to be loved, however, most of us fail to recognize that we have a parallel need: the need to love and care for others.

This desire, it turns out, is just as strong as the need to be loved and nurtured. It is the desire to love and take care of other.

We know that the desire to love and care for others is a hard-wired and deep-seated because fulfillment of this desire enhances our happiness levels.

In other words, expressing love or compassion for others benefits not just the recipient, but also its perpetrator.

We search for love because without it we aren’t complete. We take another person 'into our heart' through the positive emotions we feel for him or her.

We search for love, because it is the very reason we exist. All of us have a basic human need to feel loved and appreciated. 

We want to have our perfect partner, we spend much of our time and energy seeking that person out. Do you have a rough idea of what your perfect partner is: beautiful, or smart, or rich, or educated, or tall, or handsome, or fit, or whatever else…

Here’s a simple exercise that will help you discover and identify the qualities in your partner. Grab a pen and paper to go through this exercise, even if you are presently in a relationship.


1. The Perfect Image

On a piece of paper, list out all the qualities that your ideal partner will have. What kind of characteristics and qualities do you truly desire?  

List out the details like, lifestyle, views on money, spiritual beliefs,  hobbies, abilities, age, profession, height, weight, hair color, or anything that you want if you had your choice in creating your ideal partner.


2. Minimum Requirements

Minimum requirements are qualities you need from your partner, and without them, you will feel unsatisfied.

Go through each quality from step 1 and mark it next to the quality, otherwise, leave it blank. 

3. Screening Minimum Requirements 
Filter through the minimum requirements list, for each item with the minimum requirements label, ask the following question:

“If a person had all the other qualities on my list, am I willing to let this quality go?” If the answer is yes, cross out that from your requirements list.

Of course you could add other desires to this list, like money and wealth and other fancy things, but when you drill into these things, the reason for wanting them is so that we can appear more desirable, and will hopefully be loved and accepted. 

Do you want to have friendship and love? Check here to search for true love.


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